Wednesday, August 09, 2006


Monday, June 26, 2006

Cold Brisbane

Winter in Brisbane is certainly colder than before. I barely needed a jacket this time three years ago. Anyway, Anton, my new friend from the sunny California, US and exchange student at UQ, made this funny video about dealing with the cold here - pretty much what's happening in my own house... except that we have REAL heaters!

Get this video and more at
Quote of the Day

Sometimes, all it takes to make a difference is to do nothing.

Freedom of the Mind

Today is one of those rare days where I let myself go to allow trust to happen between me and one stranger.

A 'surreal expressional artist' is what Jared Lyell calls himself ( I think he's just plain spiritual. I met him on Queen Street... like I've never met him... because that's where he works and I've seen him several times. But it's only now that I get to know him.

As usual, He sat in the middle of the Queen Street, spray painting for people and for himself... He was doing three different pictures of dragon flies for this lady to put on her newly painted wall. And I was just... watching...until I read the quote of the day he wrote on his log book:

"Life is to enjoy, it's the freedom of the mind"

And the pictures now look different to me.

'Freedom of the mind'... that is what I'm talking about. Freedom of the mind to not conform, to not bow down to pressure, but to follow your beliefs and passion.

So I asked him to draw me a dragon fly to remind me of this principle that I will hold on to the best I can. And, it also happened that he decided that I would be his last customer of the day and also for reasons that I wouldn't know, he invited me to dinner.

It wasn't without deliberation but I felt peace to accepted his offer. And praise be to God that it turned out to be good. My decision to trust treated me to not just a sumptous meal of sashimi but an invaluable exchange of beliefs and experiences.

Thanks Jared, for letting me know I'm not alone in the walk.
Power of One

What is it about Strength that makes people powerful?
What is it about being alone that makes one feel so weak?
There's an Evil so weak but has the knowledge to make use of that strength of people.
But I have a Word so powerful against Evil that turns the weakness I felt into Strength.

You will tread upon the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpant - Psalms 91:13

Saturday, June 17, 2006

Daddy's girl again

I never knew it could bring me so much joy - Dad's flying here for my graduation ceremony. When the news came, I felt a 'Hurray', a peace, a quiet yet exhilarating feeling that made me feel like... crying.. huahuahua... So there was this craving for recognition or attention that I've always wanted from Dad but never admitted to.

Thinking back, I really haven't tried to seek his attention for a long time. Those awful memories of teenage life that created a barrier so high and wide between the two of us that our laughter ceased and our eyes refused to meet.

The last trip we took was 15 years ago. Can we wait any longer before we do this again? Each time I meet him (which is about 5 times a year and for a couple of hours each time), I see a few more lines on his weathered face. He also carries a lighter frame than he used to - a stark comparison to what he was 8-10 years ago, when he often had to make personal deliveries of heavy machineries to constuction companies because the business was going too well for his twenty-odd workers to cope with.

Anyway, I'm thinking of signing up for Rob's Rainforest Tour again. I've taken my dear brother, Alex on it before and we both enjoyed it so much. The tour plan we chose the last time took us to the Glasshouse Mountains, about 3 hours away from Brisbane and the Kondalilla Falls, which is slightly further away. With the nature as our backdrop, I'm sure Dad and I would be able to recoup some lost time.

I'm also thinking of bringing him for the juicy steaks at Hog's Breath and grilled kangaroo at Sixth Degrees.

It's exciting just thinking about the things we could do. Pray for us.

Monday, June 12, 2006

Cold Turkey (2 July - 10 July)

I'm well... I'm actually feeling pretty good. Haven't spoken, haven't written, haven't replied any of his messages.

It did take some time for me to come to my senses. Four years?

But what I had feared in the beginning since I decided that this is the end, hasn't come true. God has stayed faithful to me.

I remember standing alone in front of a mirror at a public toilet last week. I looked at myself - my eyes - the lost time... misled... blinded... severely addicted to loving him and waiting... waiting... waiting... I looked at those eyes and I called out to God... "Father, I don't want to be depressed again. I want this to be the end."

After that day, the urges to pick up the phone grew weaker and weaker.

My confidence is in Him to not wait another day.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Collateral Damage

Hmmmm... so it wasn't that long ago that I last blogged. But it was long enough for some damage to be done.

Sophie who was so embarrassed about her failed attempt to kill the ants, tried to clear the salt from the stove/sink area... Even though I had insisted I would do that when I come home (I had insisted because 1.I can't trust her to do a thing well 2. I do feel a little guilty about perhaps making her feel stupid.. just a little).

I can see she put in her very best... she washed.. she soaked... our stove... short circuit... black out... BOMB... our loyal stove who served us so well... died in her hands within a matter of hours.
So this is how I want to start my blog

Just told my new Korean housemate, "Sophie, please,I don't want any salt around my house".

Sophie's been trying to kill ants around the house with salt.


Maybe hey, that's what she's claimed she's found on the Internet. And honestly, I do feel like a meanie, depriving her of her occupancy rights to do what she deems best for the house.

But I just wanna be real, ya know.

The Sprinkle-the-salt-around-the house method just doesn't make sense to me. I rather have ants which i can kill and eliminate by keeping clean than have salt spread over my work area (aka stove and sink). PLUS, I swear I see the ants munching what was supposed to be their poison. I even suspect they have stored some for winter too. In any case, my house is fast becoming an indoor beach.

This has to stop.